God and Prayer
How often have you prayed and received nothing but silence on the other end?
Often we give up on God, falsely believing that we are too small and insignificant to matter to the creator of the universe. On the contrary, God hears and responds to every one of our prayers. However, he loves us too much to answer them in the way we expect and we are often too scattered and distracted to receive his answer in the gentle whisper that is given. Our prayers are real and heartfelt, but often insane–derive from the confusion and delusions of our human minds.
Minds that can’t see the bigger picture.
Minds utterly foreign to the mind of God.
Answering our prayers in the way we want them answered would usually harm us. Thus, in order to love us, God leaves the prayers seemingly unanswered.
However, there is a way to receive and feel God’s loving response to every prayer we pray. So let’s laugh together as we humbly acknowledge our own insanity and meet God in the only place we can–as his humble child.
Speaking of children…let’s begin with one individual who (at least on record) almost always answers seemingly insane prayers….Santa Clause.
The Time I Lied to My Toddler
NOT THE EASTER BUNNY!!!!
I used to be on Santa’s “Naughty” list. Whenever my then preschool kids would ask me about Santa, I would respond, “I’ve never seen him, but lots of people believe in him!”
Aside from being incredibly lazy–too lazy to wrap Santa gifts in different wrapping paper and actually take our kids to see the big man in red, I did have a legit reason for my unorthodox response…childhood “trauma”.
I was a bit on the older side (11ish?) when I was told Santa wasn’t “real”. The emotional imprint of that memory is a deep one. When my parents broke the news to me, my heart was screaming, “NOOOOO!!!” And then my mind went down the proverbial and literal rabbit hole….does that mean that the Easter Bunny isn’t real too? The Tooth Fairy? LEPRECHAUNS???? To be fair, I was in (I believe) 5th grade, so my parents weren’t killing a small child’s dreams. To be even more fair, my parents claim I figured the Santa thing out on my own. I claim they gave my deductive reasoning skills too much credit…
Ultimately, it was heart crushing, but not soul crushing. Yet, as a young naive mom, I worried about our boys. If they grew up hearing me say I believed in all of these fantastical beings, with no distinction between these beings and God, between the unseen that was make-believe and the unseen that was real, how would they know the difference?
Thus, I made a promise to myself–I would never lie to our boys. That way, when they figured out that Santa, the Easter Bunny, the Tooth Fairy, the Great Pumpkin, and all those other fantasy creatures weren’t real, I would be able to stand strong and say, “I never said they were real, but God is!”
Note to Parents: The creator of the universe does not need us to provide a legal defense of his reality. His law is written on our hearts. So, yeah, do your thing with Santa and crew…it’s all good!
The One Lie
Which brings us to the one time I can remember lying to our boys. I had made it (to the best of my knowledge) almost 6 years into this game of parenting with a clean slate. Then, our youngest woke up with a terrifying nightmare.
Crabs! In a pizza box! At the end of the bed! They pinched me!!!!
Yes folks, the dreamworld is a strange place. In this alternate reality, crustaceans with malicious intent utilize various items from the recycling bin in their efforts to terrorize small children.
Following my usual policy, I denied the reality of what my son saw. “There are no crabs.” I smoothed his blankets, patted down where the proverbial crab-filled pizza box was laying, and urged him to go back to sleep.
He wasn’t having it. The crabs were real, to heck with my logic, and he was not going back to sleep until the problem was resolved. At this point, I really just wanted to go back to sleep myself, so I did the unthinkable…I lied.
I pretended to close the “pizza box” and carry it out of the room. With my hands in classic “carrying a container with something very deadly inside” mime position, I tiptoed out of the room, saying “Okay, sweetie, the crabs are all gone now…you can go back to sleep!”
Within seconds, he was snoring.
God Meets Our Insanity
And that brings us back to the topic of prayer. In some ways, I wonder if my interaction with my youngest mirrors God’s ways of guiding us. Frankly, we are all completely off our rockers. The stories and dramas we bring to God in prayer are just about as wild in God’s eyes as the crabs in the imaginary pizza box were to me that night. (parenthetical thoughts are God’s additions)
“God, (your beloved child) Peggy is making my life miserable right now. Please rain down fire from heaven on her (who is really a frightened, scared soul who is lashing out in her own pain).”
“Please heal Uncle Barney from his cancer. He is suffering so much! (The suffering that is bringing him immense spiritual growth that you can’t recognize).”
“God, I really love Nate, but he doesn’t notice me! Please help!” (Nate is a dead-end and Ben–your soulmate–is waiting in the wings 6 months from now…but would you listen if I told you that?)
Unless we are quiet enough to hear his calming voice waking us up to the truth, God’s options to respond to our insane requests include:
- Speaking truth (which goes unheard) and letting us cry ourselves silly.
- Speaking truth in a very obvious way that completely undermines our free will (God’s voice booming from heaven).
- Acknowledging our reality long enough to calm us down (or realize for ourselves that we were, indeed, insane), and then guiding us back to reality.
Option 3: Calming the Storm–Bringing Us to God’s Reality
Peter Stalpaert
What Storm?
For years, the story of Jesus calming the storm struck me as bizarre. In the midst of a violent squall, Jesus, fully divine and conscious of the “danger”, slept right on through it. Jesus seemed to me to be either irresponsible or off his rocker. However, reading it with the understanding I do now lends a very different perspective.
Jesus was fully aware of the storm (the fully divine part in him was conscious of the goings ons around him at all times, even when his body was seemingly unconscious), but at the same time he was completely unconcerned with it. It was not a part of his “reality.”
From Jesus’ point of view, his soul, and all of ours, are one with God. Even the worst that could happen to his body would be no threat to his soul (something he showed clearly on the cross). Therefore, aside from a little (or a lot) of temporary physical discomfort, there was absolutely nothing to fear.
Let’s reiterate that point, which is so important that it will eventually deserve it’s own post.
There is nothing to fear. Ever.
Jesus was also in complete union with God. Unlike many of us, the still small voice spoke loudly and clearly within him. If the storm were really a threat to his and the disciples’ physical safety (they were getting swamped by waves, but nothing is known beyond this), he would have yawned, rolled over, and either calmed it instantly or (if he was suddenly devoid of his divine powers) done something about it in the Earthly sense, yet in a state of complete calm and trust in His Father.
Responding in Love
When the disciples shook Jesus awake, he had two choices:
- Speak truth to them: “Storm isn’t a threat–Boss says its fine. Here’s a dramamine–I’m going back to sleep.”
- Scream truth at them. “How many times have I told you, God’s in control!!!! I’m trying to sleep here! Chill out!”
- Step into their reality, then teach them a lesson.
Jesus clearly chose the last option. In their panic, there was no way the disciples were listening to Jesus preach about the power of listening to still voice of God or God’s sovereignty over all earthly manifestations (including storms).
Thus, Jesus handled the storm, and then rebuked the disciples for having little faith. Jesus had to step into the disciples’ insanity in order to reach them and bring them to the truth.
No Dice–Calling Out the Crazy
Stepping into the illusion and meeting his followers where they were was a frequent occurence, apparent again when Jesus rasied Lazarus from the head and healed many from their sicknesses. However, at other times, Jesus knew it was more effective to simply speak and act in truth (option 1). For example, Jesus
- touched the unclean and healed on the Sabbath, with little explanation
- refused to gift any of his followers positions of “power”
- dismissed and outright shot down any who attempted to dissuade him from his movement towards the crucifixion
- called Martha out when she criticized Mary for sitting at his feet
- declined to answer the charges against him in his trial
Unanswered Prayers
I believe that many of our unanswered prayers are the result of God, like Jesus in the gospels, refusing to engage with our insanity.
Yet, sometimes God answers prayers that stem from our disillusionment, just as Jesus calmed the storm. I wonder if sometimes we are just so darn stuck in our dreamworld that acknowledging our brand of crazy is the only way to help us out of the mess.
Sure, you can have the money to get that hot tub. Have fun getting the HOA approval, electrical rewiring, and concrete slab poured. And once you get the hot tub, you’ll see how much fun it is to balance the chemicals. When you’re done playing around with trying to get everything but me to fulfill you, we can chat again. I’ll be waiting…
-God (based on a true story from my own life–nothing against hot tubs)
Yet, for the most part, playing into our illusions just isn’t helpful. The human analogy might be helpful here.
With the exception of the crabs in the pizza box, it would have been highly detrimental to our boys’ development if I had acknowledged the reality of their nighttime fears.
Holy hell, the room IS on fire! Quick, everyone out!!! Go for the window!
Yes, buddy, Captain Hook does live under your bed. Don’t worry though, he only has one hand, and you have two, so I’m sure you could take him out.
Meeting God Halfway
Ultimately, we are human and our illusions run deep. It is hard to see beyond our Earthly perspectives.
Though God cannot meet us in our crazy illusions, he can and will meet us in our pain. Jesus had compassion on the mourning widow, wept with Mary over her brother’s death, and ate with sinners and tax collectors. He will meet us where we are, if we will allow him to. A simple “give me your eyes, God” or “Help me see this from your perspective” goes a long way to leading us to peace.
Imagine the disciples in the midst of the storm, shaking Jesus awake. Instead of anger at Jesus sleeping through the storm, what if instead they had cried out “Jesus, we are scared! Help us see this storm the way you do!” What a different conversation that would have been!
Sometimes He Calms the Storm, Other Times He Calms His Child
This brings us to the heart of prayer–complete trust in the God who loves us deeply. Scott Krippayne has a beautiful song that speaks to this. Ultimately, when we pray with an open heart, one of two things will happen: God may answer our prayer and change the situation, if it is indeed in our best interest. However, if it isn’t, he will hold us in our pain until we can see with his eyes and heart and return to his peace.
We just need to be open to being held by God, to accept that we might not be seeing things clearly. We need to be willing to be taught by the one much wiser than us and trust that he indeed loves us and wants what is best for us.
As for our family, the malicious crabs did not make a return visit. However, over the years, many other equally insane imaginings have made an appearance in the dark of the night. As a more experienced mama, I no longer try to reason or “fake out” my frightened children. Instead, I simply snuggle in their beds with them for a few minutes. Just knowing I’m there is soothing and they quickly fall into a peaceful sleep. They have learned to trust me, trusting that I love them and will protect them, trusting that I will act in their best interest, whatever may come.
Would it be too much for us to do the same with respect to God?